Child Sexual Abuse

 

My first experience with child sexual abuse

My second-year teacher I had a little boy in my preschool classroom that what much more aware of private areas, sexual language children his age shouldn’t know, and he showed inappropriate play with other children. While using the bathroom he always wanted to go alone and didn’t want others to see him because he didn’t like that they talked about his blue and purple penis and he hated that they asked him why it was always sticking out. This concerned me but I didn’t know how to bring it up to his parents or my boss. Maybe this is how little boys are somethings. He was a larger boy then the other guys, I didn’t know much about children at this point. I was in my first year of college and again it was only my second year of being a preschool teacher at a small childcare center. Almost every naptime he played with himself to fall asleep, then he would wake up because of a nightmare.

One day during nap he woke up crying. I had him come sit with me. Ask him if he wanted to talk about his dream. He told me it wasn’t a dream, it really happened. I said, “What really happened?” He made me promise not to tell anyone. He told me his Father made him and his sister touch each others private areas and lay together in the Livingroom while his Mom made dinner. I let him talk but asked some questions about where and when this happened. I was so glad he felt comfortable enough with me to tell me this. I had his sister the first year I taught and I didn’t know anything was going on. He went back on his cot and I took my break, calling 696kids. With in an hour Child Protective Services where at the childcare center and getting the sister from her public school. My boss was upset because I told her after I called 696Kids and she told me she could fire me for calling them. The agent told me to play with the boy until the police can get to the center. The father walked in to pick him up and I was told to keep him safe and at the center until the police can talk to the father. We were playing UNO and the father let us finish the game. I was sitting in a chair and the little boy was standing in front of me at the table. My arms where on either side of him. I wasn’t letting him out of my site. When the agents took him away and the police took the father away and left the center, I couldn’t control my emotions. I cried hysterically for two hours. Did I do the right thing? Am I going to lose my job? Am I in the right profession? I was so scared. I was only twenty years old.

I found out months later that the children when back with their mother, they moved to a different city and had other schools. The mother knew nothing about the actions the father was doing. The mother and children were all getting counseling and the father went to jail. When I heard all this, I knew I did the right thing. But it is always on my mind, even now, fifteen years later. I am still extremely emotional about it, crying as I write this post.

“Globally, Overall the highest prevalence rates for child sexual abuse reported in Africa are from Morocco, Tanzania and South Africa. African rates of abuse likely surpass figures elsewhere, mainly because of rapid social change and patriarchal nature of most African societies – variables that have been known to foster sexual abuse.”(Badoe, 2017)

 

References

Badoe, E. (2017). A critical review of child abuse and its management in Africa. African Journal of Emergency Medicine, 7, S32–S35. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.afjem.2017.09.002

Child Sexual Abuse Prevention Darkness to Light. (2015). Darkness to Light. https://www.d2l.org/

nctsnadmin. (2018, March 5). Caring for Kids: What Parents Need to Know about Sexual Abuse. The National Child Traumatic Stress Network. https://www.nctsn.org/resources/caring-kids-what-parents-need-know-about-sexual-abuse